Deep Water (2026)

If you are ever boarding a plane and you see Aaron Eckhart in the cockpit you should probably take another flight.  Between this movie and Clint Eastwood’s  “Sully", Eckhart manages to be the co-pilot on two disastrous flights. Of course one of them turns out well and he ends up a hero, This one, not so much. “Deep Water” Is an Amalgam Of Disaster Film And Shark Exploitation. Like the movie “Bait" from a few years ago, we have a disaster followed up by shark attacks, but instead of a tsunami, “Deep Water” has a plane crash in the ocean.

To be honest with you I wasn't expecting much, this looks like it might even be a straight to video Shark film. It's actually much better than it has any right to be and in fact Renny Harlin,  the director of this film, seems to be back in form when it comes to creating a suspenseful action movie. After early successes like “Die Hard 2” and "Cliffhanger” , Harlan has been inconsistent, with several films  relegated to direct video in the last 10 years. He had a film out last year that just got a token release in theaters and I'll bet you didn't even know that. Unfortunately this film also got a very limited release, and because it didn't take over the box office in the first weekend it disappeared from most theaters, which is too bad. “Deep Water" is an exciting disaster picture, with a truly horrifying crash sequence and plenty of suspense in the shark sections.

Ben Kingsley is the co-star, and he's just fine as the older pilot,  who makes the initial tough decisions  Ultimately he gives way to Eckhart's First officer. Not to give too much away, that's not by choice. There is just enough character development of some of the passengers to make us interested in what's going on, but not so much just to turn it into a soap opera. When the time comes for us to root for certain characters to survive or to be consumed, we know exactly where our feelings are going to rest.

Slow burn is not the way I would describe the picture but it does take its time to get started. Once the crash sequence starts however, it is phenomenally frightening and I think it will make you more afraid of flying than the Sharks will make you fear being in the water. The combination of practical effects and CGI are very convincing. The interior shots of the plane are very effective and practical, and even the exterior CGI is pretty solid.   There are a number of hazards that show up in the crash sequence that you probably haven't thought about , but will make you nervous the next time you get on an airplane. Fires and falling luggage are bad enough, but you better keep your seatbelt on if you know what's good for you.

In the long run this film doesn't do anything new, it just does what it's supposed to do very well and that is to entertain us. You should be gripping your arm rest pushing yourself back into the seat and occasionally closing your eyes during several moments in the film. The Shark sequences are solid, and I think the sharks look better than the CGI sharks that Harlan had in “Deep Blue Sea”, but I'll probably get yelled at for saying so. 

Aaron Eckhart's character has a personal backstory that doesn't seem to make much sense, and it is clearly manipulative at the end of the film. That's okay though, his character has managed to secure the safety of as many passengers as possible, including the adorable children that you knew were going to be part of the plot.

So you probably won't get a chance to see this in theaters but when it shows up on your streaming service, take the plunge and fork over a couple of bucks. One of The Producers on the film, of which there are at least a hundred it seems like, is Gene Simmons of  Kiss, who of course wants your money. So go ahead and give it to him and have a good time and enjoy the surprise of a competently made film that does what it sets out to do without embarrassing anyone.

San Andreas

I understand the commerce behind a film like this. Big action, a big star, and over the top visual sequences make money. Look, I put down my twelve bucks so I guess I should not complain too much, except what does it say about me and the rest of humanity when we watch disaster porn? Are we confronting our fears and our own mortality or are we revealing in the destruction and enjoying watching millions of people die? I just can't anwser. I feel a little dirty but it is also such a stupid movie that I feel silly for feeling guilty, talk about mixed emotions.

Southern California is the only home I have ever known, and I know that we are all going to be very unhappy when the "Big One" does show up. I rode out the 1971 quake in Sylmar, the 87 Whittier Narrows Quake that killed my hometown theater, and the 94 Northridge quake which made the area sit up and beg. Every once in a while we get a good sized movement of the earth that reminds us that stuff is happening below our feet. This movie wants to bitch slap you into alertness and then make you care about five people while the whole west coast is going to hell in a handbasket. If anyone is better prepared as a result of seeing this, that would be a good thing. The problem is that this movie suggests that we are all pretty much screwed unless we have a helicopter, a plane and a boat at our disposal. Also, pack Dwayne Johnson in your EQ kit because mere mortals are not going to survive without this kind of hero.

The former "Rock" has been a movie star for fifteen years now. He is in one of the biggest franchises in Hollywood, and he gets better as an actor each time out while keeping the charisma that made him a star wrestler before he moved over to the silver screen. He loads this unbelievably derivative story on his broad shoulders and powers though it as if it were Shakespeare. He does not play it camp and he does a credible job playing the hero that everyone will need in a disaster. If Liam Neeson and others are the Old Guy fantasy of competence, Johnson is right there with them, assuming the old guys look like Arnold Schwarzenegger reborn.

Take three parts "Earthquake", one part "The Towering Inferno", one part "The Poseidon Adventure", throw in a dash of "2012" and "The Day After" and you have this movie. Match it with state of the art visual effects to depress the hell out of anyone who remembers 9/11 and you will see what I mean. This movie is cheesy as hell but also sadly familiar. I spent hours watching tsunami videos after the Japanese disaster a few years ago, and I felt like a gawker at the scene of a car accident, but still not able to look away. The dramatic action scenes in this movie still manage to involve you because the main characters are likable and we have followed them through the whole story, but look around and there are a hundred other stories that end in tragedy every time our leads make it thorough ( which they would never do it this was real.)

Paul Giamatti is credible as a Cal Tech scientist, and he adds a little gravitas to the proceedings but the whole scenerio is so over the top that in the long run it does not matter. If you can swallow your self loathing and just load up on popcorn, you will be moderately entertained. If you are at all conflicted about the idea, then maybe you should wait for the next comic book movie, where it is easier to laugh off the ludicrious amount of destruction as just being a movie.