Paramount Summer Classic Film Series-To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar

Here's a movie that I haven't seen in 20 years, but I did see numerous times in the first 10 years after it was released. This was one of those films that when I acquired it on LaserDisc the kids decided they were going to watch repeatedly. I'm not sure exactly why it had an appeal for them, except that it featured adults acting in particularly stupid ways which may have made them feel a little superior. Plus there are cool songs.

At the time this came out it seemed an innocuous entertainment with a secondary theme of acceptance. The world has changed a great deal in the last 30 years and both sides of the lgbtq+  whatever divide would probably find much to object to in this film. For the most part I thought it was still mildly funny, and borrowed heavily from other films. The three lead actors all have something in this film that should make them happy to have it on their Vita, but that doesn't mean that the movie is great. It's a fantasy that stretches believability way past the breaking point. That it does so in a fairly genial way is the one thing about it that allows me to forgive some of the dumb stuff.

I'm sure Patrick Swayze was proud of this movie, coming as it did after some of the action films that he had done. This was a chance to show off a little leg, and some acting chops, that didn't really require him to throw more than one punch. Wesley Snipes is in the film, but his character has almost no arc to the story, and he seems to exist just to fill in spots that need an extra character. John Leguizamo, would probably be strung up by the LGBT plus community because he's basically appropriating a role that should have gone to a real drag queen, and he uses every stereotype you can think of to play a gay man who dresses as a woman. This sort of casting could probably not be done today. In fact I seem to remember that Scarlett Johansson ended up canceling a film where she was supposed to be a crossdresser, and there was political outrage.

The movie starts off as a road trip movie, but ends up as a fairy tale when our three protagonists land in an isolated town, and have to rescue the damsels in distress, from the local dragons. That they do so by using a beauty parlor, a used clothing store, and a makeup kit, is one of the charming yet ridiculous premises of the second half of the film. It doesn't really help that the two men who are the primary antagonists are drawn in such a cartoonish manner. The husband of one of the local women is it domestic abuser, and the sheriff who is pursuing the three drag queens, is not only homophobic but racist as well. He also seems perfectly willing to exceed his authority by using deadly force to try and take into custody people who's only real crime was having a tail light that was out. It is also a little fantastic to believe that the young hoodlums who seem to populate the small town, can be overcome by one assertive encounter, that involves having their testicles groped.

When the film originally came out, maybe there weren't a lot of movies that offered representation to people in this subculture. This film feels a little bit like the white savior movies that try to bridge the divide over race, only here it is working on gender. The clothes are nice to look at, and I always like the Spartacus moment at the end of the film, mostly because I think Stockard Channing is terrific, and she gets to lead the charge.

I enjoyed seeing the movie again, although I do think under the existing circumstances it will be treated negatively by the opposing sides for completely different reasons. As a time capsule of what the world was like, it is a little biased but still enjoyable. I just don't think it would be a good idea to use this as a basis of any political discourse in the present world. Although the stupidity that would follow if you did would be...FABULOUS. 

Blade-Paramount's Summer Classic Films Series

Once again, there is nothing like seeing a film with an appreciative audience. Last nights group gathered for a screening of Blade, was not massive like the Rocky Horror and Road Warrior Screenings have been, but they were loud and enthusiastic. From the moment that Wesley Snipes enters the picture, his every move was marveled at, cheered and certainly appreciated. "Blade" may be the coolest superhero to ever don tactical gear, sunglasses, and a katana. 

The back story does not matter much, let's just say that Blade is a vampire and a vampire hunter. This movie was a Marvel film a decade before the start of the Cinematic Universe they created. It has the trappings of most of the comic book movies of that era, techno music, early CGI and some story shorthand that is needed to get things rolling right to the action. The villain is a young handsome upcoming actor, Stephen Dorff, the plot gives Blade a female counterpart and a sidekick, and there is a conspiracy with the real authorities. Oh, and the climax of the film involves some mumbo jumbo about a Vampire God. 

Sometimes last night's audience was hooting at some of the outdated moments. The villain for instance uses a computer with some primitive graphics that might have been cutting edge in their day but now look quaint. Kris Kristofferson  plays the withering sidekick to Blade, and his indifference to the gasoline he is pumping while lighting a cigarette provoked howls because it was supposed to. By the way, Kristofferson is the spitting image in this film of my buddy Don Hayes.

Snipes gets to kick ass several times in the film. His opening salvo involves silver infused bullets that cause the vampires to explode. There is a nice scene with some stakes, a knife and the sharp edged boomerang that is supposed to have been designed by his partner. The main battle at the end however is a sword fight that would be impossible for him to win because of the supercharged nature of the villain. That might be a problem but the cool part is that Blade gets to perform what would have been the coup de grace several times in the scene. 

There are two sequels to this film, I don't think I have seen either of them. This is only the second time I saw this film, and it felt a lot like a first time since I remembered very little about it. I think the reboot should be pretty good, but let's face it, no one is going to replace Wesley Snipes. Mahershala Ali will be cool, but he won't be cool in the same 90's way. 

Expendables 3

Two reactions are typical when talking about an "Expendables" movie; "Damn is that awesome" or "Damn is that Pathetic". I happen to fall into the former category, so if you fit into the later, you can pretty much skip this, it is not going to fit your world view. Aging action stars plus plenty of shootouts plus bad jokes equals two hours of fun in August as far as I've gone with these flicks. There is not any real artistry, the plots are boiler plate and the outcome is inevitable. These are comfort food for people who miss Bob's Big Boy and Hair Metal. Sometimes there is a nice new element to make the movie interesting and to keep us coming back. This movie has three or four of those elements.

I rarely spend more than a sentence or two describing plot in any of my reviews, I don't like spoilers. With a movie like this, it is even simpler because the plot is so direct. The team must take down a rogue former member who has turned evil arms dealer. That's it. Sure more happens and there are some justifications for jumping into a new set of recruits and bringing the old crew back, but it is straight get the bad guy stuff. What does help is that the bad guy this time is Mel Gibson. With all the baggage he has accumulated in the last few years, he has not been a regular screen presence. That's too bad because he is quite good and charismatic on screen, whether playing a hero or the baddie. The three Expendable movies have been slowly creeping up in the quality of the antagonist. Eric Roberts in the first film was fine but did not get much development. Jean- Claude Van Damme was more successful because his showdown with Stallone is the epic climax of the movie. Gibson gives the movie a sense of credibility it would not otherwise deserve and his dialogues with the team contain the right kind of ominous threat to keep our expectations high.

Also joining the cast and classing up the franchise is Harrison Ford.  In the 80s, Stallone and Schwarzenegger were the brawn of action movies. They were the guys who kicked butt. Gibson and Ford were the brains of action movies. Their films had plot twists and sophistication and did not rely on brute strength to get the mission accomplished. Ford shows up as the replacement for Bruce Willis's character in the movie. He treats the script with more seriousness than anyone would think is possible and raises the bar on the believability scale. In the long run it may be a futile effort, but it doesn't end up like it is just stunt casting, even though there is an amusing line about what became of Agent Church.

The unique part of this film is the recruitment of a younger generation of Expendables whose loss  Barney will not feel as much. The selection process involves another old friend, Kelsey Grammer. Channeling a rougher version of Frasier Crane, Grammer gets in some funny lines and a little bit of pop psychology to go with all the nonsense. Stealing the show by playing the dangerous buffoon is Antonio Banderas. Having watched "Desperado" just a day ago, I can say his action bonafides are in order. His comedy chops from "Puss in Boots" appear to be in good working shape as well. Four other young actors are tossed in, it would seem with the intention of carrying on the series when it will look too odd to have grandad diving through a window with a Howitzer under his arm. Wesley Snipes is introduced as another former colleague who has been away from the action scene for a while. The main justification for his presence is the joke about what he was doing prison time for in the third world country the team breaks him out of.

I understand that someone might say they were tired of the same old, same old. If you seek creativity and innovation in your action film, move along, there is nothing for you here. Those of us who do not mind a lot of the familiar and enjoy a big chunk of cheese with our weekend fix of adrenaline, will appreciate the continuing adventures of the old timers. Yeah they look a little long in the tooth, but they also look like they could take most of us out in twenty seconds or less. Until they reach my level of physical prowess, I'm still willing to go along for the ride.